Home » Humor » Recently discovered element – heaviest known to science

Recently discovered element – heaviest known to science

I don’t normally report on scientific discoveries, but a fellow blogger forwarded this article posted at Brutally Honest and I felt obligated to the Human Race to repost and make sure as many people as possible knew about this phenomenon!

Lawrence Livermore National Laboratory in California  has now identified with certainty the heaviest element known to science.

The new element, Pelosium (PL), has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons, and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.

These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons.

Pelosium is inert, and has no charge and no magnetism.  Nevertheless, it can be detected because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact.  A tiny amount of Pelosium can cause a reaction that would normally take less than a second, to take from 4 days to 4 years to complete.

Pelosium has a normal half-life of 2 years.  It does not decay, but instead undergoes a biennial reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places.

Pelosium mass will increase over time, since each reorganization will promote many morons to become isodopes.

This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that Pelosium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass.

When catalyzed with money, Pelosium becomes Senatorium, an element that radiates just as much energy as Pelosium since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons.

No matter what your political affiliation, you have to admit….that’s funny! Change the name to make it apply to who every you want. Pelosium works just fine for me. Just thought I would give you all a little break from the “not so humorous” world of DoD contracting and their fraudulent contractors.


Ms Sparky

my image

One Comment

  1. Comment by wallace:

    ya pelosi works for me too..along with reid, dodd, frank, schumer, and the whole bunch of them that had anything to do with bailouts and raising taxes, and the stupid so called health care bill.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *